Finally 2011!!


why am i excited for the fact that we are in 2011? jus a very lame reason that its the Rabbit's year of the Chinese Zodiac; because I was born in the year of this zodiac animal two cycles ago..


and so, i leaked my own age ya...



its been some while since i blogged. the last time was 5 months ago!! and since then, many things happened and it certainly added some spices to my life.


i left my job of 3 years(may 2007 - aug 2010) and found a new job 1 month later in an industry that i probably would not expect myself to be in.. <>


call me dumb or pure, but i truted my comrade who told me that this was a great 'offer' not to be missed. and being me, i jus tooked it up..


many 'first time' within that 5 months of mine.. and now that i blogged about it, i dunno where to start!


oh my.. i seriously need to start doing stuffs that i need to do.. have been procrastinating way too much! (like installing printer. :O)


and so, i did a lil revamp of my workspace to make myself a lil happier..

but.. my almost-dying-6-years-old compact computer doesnt allow me to get photos from my iphone.. hmmmm..



mmm..




mmmmm..




ANYWAY, this is MY year and im supposed to set some really awesome resolution! but im still having my plans changed here and there.. and plans being plans, i have not done anything about them yet..


the past 4 months has been a great, great period of training for me.. thou not enough but i have experience quite a ot of stuff that is making me do my personal human revolution.. and now i have seen some of them, i need to change the negative ones and tap on the positive ones.. easier said than done. the most difficult obstacle is getting over myself.. ironic isnt it?


i always thought i was a simple-minded person. but recently i realised im not. if i modulate my way of thinking against most people, i think of too many unseen possibilities.. it was only because i lived each day as it is and didnt make plans for the future thus seeing myself as 'simple minded'.. hard truth it is..


thus in this new year, nono, this upcoming 11 months i must work hard towards the next few years "so as to achieve peace, happiness and prosperity for the nation." Jia You!

actually was nothing much, really..


i got my pay ytd and was jus fusing over how i should use the money to 'upgrade' my gadgets and stuffs. a geek is not a geek without her gadgets and tools. XD


ytd met with wf to talk abt snco. no matter it was late or not, i really appreciate hers and others' efforts in making all these important seemingly-insignificant efforts behind the scenes. like the underlying waves that will stir a big deal when the time is right! ;)


i was really feeling guilty and lousy because i am supposedly a chapter leader. and yet im still lacking of wisdom and depth and character and experience.


since i've decided that i'd do something(anything, jus something) at the start of this year and also to stop making too many unnecessary considerations, i guess yesterday's talk was another reminder for me to do just that.


yes i need to breakthru this constrain. im a creative ya 'know~!


so after the dialogue, i went to meet my sis.. she said she had a voucher to collect and it has to be at tamp. so i met her there and jus outside the linkway between Tm and Cs, i saw my zaza! and she seemed so shocked and hugged me tight. ohwells, but im happy that she treasure me so. haha.. can i say that it means like this?


yup and shoe hunting begans at that particular shop. after all the mess i made out of myself while trying the shoes, my sis say she didnt see anything tt she fancy. and so i bought a pair and got a $5 discount! better than nothing.. haha..


then we went shopping for clothes and stuffs. in the end, i bought a vest and a 'jacket' for decoration. yay~ im all ready for the switch to school.. hahaha..


and so, i suddenly realised that this year i get to keep my workspace at home without clearing it like previous years for the reunion dinner cuz we're eating out! woohoo~ for both reasons i think.. its a first for the families so i really want it to turn out well. and for being able to keep my workspace messy as it is. i really wanted a personal space but i have to train myself to be able to work in the worst situations. i can do it!

lemme blog a quick post before heading to my manga. :P



today was the day or probably friday WAS the day where i finally took some action for a dream that i wanted to realise long ago.. and i was glad i had hor hor to accompany me. even thou she was almost 2 hours late. tch!


the first stop was quite disappointing and energy draining. at first i wanted to walk around then i realised some levels of the building was locked and we can only visit if we join the guided tour. didnt manage to see anything much nor get any useful information. gotta go thru the pamphlets again.


the second stop was somewhat more reassuring.. the environment was nice. but at the same time it gave me tremendous stress because i wasnt sure if i could cope. anyway, i didnt want to waste the efforts of my friend who came to accompany me so i summon all the courage and went to check out the details and even did the application! (cuz its free) and oh, its such a coincidence that i saw my senior there. she prob forgot my name but i still rem hers and what instrument she play. hahaha..


so it was something unexpected or shld i say i didnt put in effort to think about it. and now i have two impt dates for me to take action till then: 21 Jan and 19 March.


im really nervous and unsure.. but i've thought that nothing will happen if i act so cowardly always. i'll just do my best. if it is what im supposed to, definitely i'll be able to see things coming and happening.


and because i wanted to take action more than sitting there and think like what i've been doing for the past years, i started reading the NHR.. vol 14 chpt 1 titled 'Wisdom and Courage'. chose this because this are the two qualities i need to polish urgently. and in it sensei wrote about the student protest and mostly on student division. of course the content is not only relevant to students. so i wanted to summon my wisdom and courage too. to fight my best no matter what and im trying hard not to doubt my own innate potential. so my friends, just put in your best and you might see wonderful and painful things as well which will create a strong innate self. ok im tired so cant be bothered to write my sentences properly.


Wisdom and Courage. Gambatte!

was just busying doing up guidances, printing them, testing size. OOPS! wrong size. adjust, finaly print, color print, cut-out, stick and ta-da!! its done. im pretty fast.

and suddenly i felt lost. whats next?

oh man. i really feel like i have lived a quarter of a century on earth but has the body of a old women. *sighs*

had alot of work to do.. its true! its just that i've been procrastinating and many many other distractions in the office.

took a day off yesterday. planned to do some spring cleaning cuz the stuffs has been piling up. interestingly, i read this comic titled 'Switch Girl' and was just thinking how i might just be one. thou there isnt any handsome male lead in my version. :P

and so, to continue, my day off was practically cut by half due to sleep. i know.. "you're such a ^(^@@^)^" muz be what you're thinking right? anw, i was really tired and then i had my lunch and starting to clean up here and there. and FFPRTISS, my mom was pissed with me for the entire day and also she threw me two boxes of my possession from centuries ago.

i dug inside and found stuffs from my pri sch times, or even younger. really, those were memories. but there is no point in keeping all those stuffs because i can never use them again. and yea, their destiny into the dustbin. OFF YOU GO! was what i said in my mind. the 2nd box, was a box of my furry friends and a few pieces of costumes and props from YCF & NDP. so bag by bag i 'released' my friends.. i was surprised to find that i actually owned a saxophone playing santa. (with music!) i completely forgot bout it. and many other toys that were given to me. (ahem ahem.) and of cuz, quite alot of stuffs that 'it' gave me. i threw most of them away. i know im realistic. because i kept a pair of tatty bear(they're expensive) and a mug which i washed and intend to use. i think i was a lil mad when i was throwing all my old stuffs away, constantly mumbling to myself. scary eh? anw, there wasnt any feelings to the stuffs and the sender in particular.

then i found a box which i could stuff my received cards and letter from kalpas. kalpas because it has been a while since i received snail mails and maybe the next time i feel friendless, i can jus take out the box and think of my friends. :D (gone crazy x 2)

and then, i realised that most of my gifts were from guys. SAD~~ i have no female friends.. maybe guys really go all out when they have a target. i was just thinking. how was the me then? why didnt i accept anyone of them? i guess they're not bad guys.. they're really not. its just that i was afraid. shhh.. this is my secret. so i cant really tell you why. but i have my reasons behind.. and i guess its good that way.

and i only managed to clear that two boxes and already TBLTH. nose was running and i couldnt carry on. nothing much was done actually.. i think have to spend another 2 or 3 days to clear it up. my brain too. maybe got to reformat and install some anti-virus so that it will work really fine in 2010. :P

jus do something. dun think so much. :D

been looking like a goldfish.. dunno what's wrong with me.. been feeling the 'burden' of swollen eyes when i already have very small gap to view the world.. :S




network at workplace is very unstable.. so much so that its getting on my nerves very soon if it doesnt stabilise.. RAWR. 'YOU BETTER BE GOOD OR.. OR.. OR..'


see, i cant do anything.. jus be angry and kill all my happy cells. :(






and then, i have been thinkin.. if one is given a choice to customise the amt of talent we could be born with, will i want to be a smart but innocence-minded or dumb but high EQ person?


haha.. its a tough choice man.. because it seems that im low on either side.. this makes things so tough.. really.. i see the existence of talent no matter how much i do not want to admit. certain things, its really fine to not be good at it.. but other things, u cant polish it even though you are very hardworking.. you can only learn by going through it.


sounds a bit pessimistic? maybe the society has successfully made me negative by providing so many opportunities to.




what else can you do when something you wish to do so much seems to be something that the other party does not want you to do?


for now, i can only chant.. i will continue until i know how to proceed on.. :D





像打不死的蟑螂就是我的精神！

- a new workstation (either PC or laptop)
- a new HD
- a new hairdo/hairstyle/treatment
- a new phone and/or mp3 and/or gadget
- some new clothes
- new watch
- new pouches


ARGH!! ah tu is being materialistic!!
tml is formation day and yet here i am tryin to review what i want to buy..


have i missed out anything? what else do i need to bring is on my mind.. but more imptly, i think im not mentally prepared neh. :S have not been doing enough reachout.. hence, very very afraid of the turnout tml.. :S:S:S
alot is due to my last-min inform? and others..
in fact, those that i want to reach out to are those that WERE active or even leaders..


sent off my ywd who will be pursuing her dream of studies at her homeland.. i will miss you, yunya!


and XC is still in UK.. praying for her to realise her dreams, even if its not in singapore.. Gambatte to both!


anw, my attitude is the same as in, regardless of the turnout, i must cont to do my reachout and foster my YWDs who are still 'hot' in their passion.. :D i will touch:gan dong all of them!! i know ZONE has not much time thus i muz not disappoint her.


im seriously thinkin of buying mac.. its like so CHEAP.. but other than space constrain, other probs like OS compatibility will cause many inconveniences of me if i change without a backup. and the so-called recognised WD has crashed. send it to US? either i risk the physical lost or the virtual lost. SIGHHHHHHHH


and went shopping w hor-er.. the new OC has opened.. with not much shop.. the boutiques are also.. ahem ahem.. not my type? i think the fashion now is abit strange.. doesnt really cater to pple like me.. strangeeee. or maybe im the odd one out.. ha!


ah tu needs to slim slim slim slim slim.



"This used to be a fun house ta da da da, dum dum dum
but now its full of evil clowns ta da da da, dum dum dum
its time to start the countdown
im gonna burn it down, down ,down
im gonna burn it down!"

today was late for work again!! and my students r earlier than me lor.. GOSH, such a bad example. :S


lesson was bad. i need to be able to push my students even more. teaching is a tough job. im glad i dun have the intend to further into this kind of profession, neither am i a suitable candidate as a salesperson. XD


and after a looooooooooooong time, MH and me went to look for 'lin you jia' again.. wah.. i think i really became quite raw and bloated and stuffs. :S thoughts to terminate the contact thou.. unless anyone else wans to join me? :D


then i think the salesperson there also very clever lor.. pretend to chaoz after the class ended so we cant 'talk' to him. perhaps he got seventh sense leh.. hahaha.. and since he wasnt there, we went for our dinner.. a super fillin dinner man.. sinful.. and the waiter was damn funny la.. the first thing i noticed was that he walked very quickly and like a robot. o.O! then, was his height. i think it was 2m? and he could s-t-r-e-t-c-h.. without much effort to place stuffs from one end of a round table to the other end. like woah~
next was the way he talked. maybe because he was an indian so it especially added flavours and colors to his speech.. XD i was very much entertained. and towards the end, because my food came late(due to some reason, i didnt not catch wad was it) he kept apologizing and when i rejected his offer of 'chilli and tabaesco sauce' he said something like 'your mood is down already isit?' like quite loh sor and persistent but i think its his sincerity and concern towards customers' satisfaction.
in fact, two more interesting stuffs but im tired.


thats y i say i cant be a salesperson. i probably boh chup. XD


skippin prac this sun. :D

is to blog!! i need to blog! jus to type down my thots before they disappear..

today is such a 'qiao' day to have met a ywd friend on the way to scc.. supposed to meet JH & ML for bf but one of them woke up late.. cause and effect for me ba.. :S


then THP was sick and didnt come for prac.. daijobu ka? but we have a few more to join us! *claps*


really.. it was because i didnt chant hard..


the SURPRISE was, my ywd actually texted me sayin tt she wants to pick up momentum in activities again and asked me to update her! woohoo.. like, WOOHOOO!!! after much thinkin, im sure it was my zone.. but to prevent myself from being over-confident, im gg to dedicate all energies to chanting even more.. hoping to be able to attract all the good forces..


when chanting, i was thinking.. 11 recruits, 5 audited, 6 dropped and half of the bulk was somehow linked to me in a way. it mus be me not putting enough efforts.. ther's no time to stop and blame and feel bad and bla bla bla. lets move on.


then rushed down to senja(VERY LATE. T_T ).. and i was supposed to be the emcee! but havin my zone ard really gives me a secure feeling. like how starlight program pple describe when singing with their seniors.. :D i will be better..


then worked on the prep.. forget the complain because i dun wan myself to be biased against anyone. its the time to foster and i know im esp weak at this module. i can be a very good mbr, a good follower but not a holistic leader who can fulfill all of what i need to. moto moto!!


then went down to town to repair watch. :S $10++++ de watch no need to spend so much effort but it broke down on the 2nd day of purchase and i jus wanted justice. lucky i need no gang nor tattoos to boost my 'gung-ho-ness'. :D


met giraffe wheni was abt to leave.. he still look so friendly and stuff and i didnt really wanna stay to have a chat.. im anti-social. XD


skipped lunch and had a heavy dinner. now i know why i grow fats so quickly.. URG. :(


and so, ah tu's exciting field trip ends with her tryin to finish the never-ending work. (yay~)

been slackin alot in my chanting.. and i also feel the strain brought by it. has been tryin to 'cheat time' in work.. feel very bad abt this cuz there're many deadlines to be met.. ARGH.. so unmotivated. perhaps im too concerned abt the 'PR' that i only respond to nice pple.. XD and im gonna been moved away to the room inside which makes my grudge even deeper.


after the announcement of the music challenge, i thought that at least i muz try to start earlier in my readings and practice.. so i went searching for scores and such. invested $21 which will last me 365 days, 1 day = 0.05753425 cents. quite worth it ba.. :D

then i spent another $14.90 support my vomit-elephant buyin his 7th album. nice~!

and so, every month im crackin my brain on how can i break apart the $$ in the piggy such that i can last till the 26th. it is so xin ku.. but i think i've gotten quite used to it.. got to work w abit of hynpotizing myself thou.. haha..

really.. online is not a good time for pple to pour their heart and tears and such.. but it is a medium for me to count my ker-chng, and share good photos with all!


a beautiful sky.. the sun went away during the moment i took this.

can you see the cable cars?

beautiful light shone on the school building of CGS.

i love orange pieces of sky. this one was taken near my hse i think.. slightly blurred.

another try..

sunrise! can you see the sun rising energetically? as thou it is calling our to us to move on with high spirits too!

this is around 730pm @ tamp.. (name of foodcourt is Jurong cafe. LOL!)

and lastly, this is one of my favourite.. the same sky at tamp but at a different angel.. it looks quite artistic w parts of the lampost showing rite? :D



thats all folks!

the past week has nothing much worth mentioning.. except the part about me and my tablet. i bought a wacom tablet!!! it was like wooh~~ XD

a big hole in my pocket.. my new expensive gadget since the PHD bought during march IT fair and since the LT that i bought 5-6 yrs ago..

but a bigger wish is to modify or get a new laptop cuz of specs issue.. this laptop aint functioning very well.. and also the dream of havin my own room and workspace.. many things has been going around and they're jus playin tai-chi themselves in my head.. and then all these will go back to the original point where my mom/dad will say the same old thing..

i wonder.. y they can say the same thing over and over again, bring up the same old topic even after many years.. i wonder..

i need to think much more, much deeper.. and i suddenly feel like my laptop. old and working beyond my means.. then i realised it was because each time things happen, the error prompts and command given to ignore and thus, it happens..

and so sunday came.. the announcement of the 'ordeal' came~~ T___T
didnt want to be the person who pulls everyone morale.. when its time to face it, one has to i think.. 11 pple reduced to 8. i really feel sad about this. is it because i am not determined enough? i didnt chant enough dmk for the success? what isit? and just when i tried so hard to convinced others, i went back to being myself and its jus like slapping my own face.

even thou the 'wonderful' thing about the organisation is everyone will forgive you or embrace you, maybe sometimes i jus need the honesty. come on! be honest with yourself. i need to be brave. to have courage is faith. this is what sensei says and yet im one who does all the talking and no action? ha. no wonder..

my XC flew to UK yesterday.. went to the airport to send her off and i brought along a CD compilation of songs and a letter with few words.. my potential is leavin to seek her dreams and i've nothing to make her stay because if it was me, i would want to be able to seek and fulfil my dreams, my mission.. truly admired her for her courage because its a very difficult time now esp. in the west.. somehow like 去西取经 hor.. despite being her 'leader', i learnt many things and am always encouraged by her passion and enthusiasm.. watched "败犬" and the male lead said something like "与其埋怨事情的不足，倒不如想想如何让以后不再发生同样的事" kinda stuffs.. this is applicable in all aspects of our life and it only allow me to confirm once again that what im doing is correct.

had a very good but short dialogue w my zone at the airport. already at the beginning i knew she was someone that i can follow... someone practising correctly and a true disciple of sensei. maybe along the road it was too tough and she was the only one who hung on. but because of her determination, things are starting to change. of cuz i have to get going as well! sensei dun have much time to wait for me.

2 friends jus got attached.. and i wonder.. im in no stand to judge for now because i've also failed in my own past relationship.. they seem unsure of this relationship, like how i was.. and like my own child, i would want to protect them from the pain and hurt they might get down the road but at the same time, we also know that we will only become a better person, gain life's experience after overcoming it.. no matter what, i'll cont to send daimoku to them for their happiness.. 她们不要我了！when thinkin abt this in the morning, "我很丑，可是我很温柔~~" flew across my head.. hahahhaha..

from 爱就tgt: "为什么我还是一个人？" i always wonder.. partly because im lonely? or isit because i feel inferior that 'nobody wans me'.. haha.. im also not sure.. but having a bf/gf should be built on the friendship and trust when the two got to know one another and not just solely on emotions ba..if not very quickly, will end up like me. XD and it is definitely not a sign of power or authority ba.. strange that i have this kind of thinking.

sometimes i wished "能不能就让一切尽在不言中". because im not still not someone who is able to express myself correctly.. like the girl in this particular anime, i have a different view from the signal i give people. and the conclusion is i still dunno how.. the tin-man in 'WOO'.. it is good that i dun have courage. because with a temper like mine i dunno what i will end up doin when i was still much younger(although i still very young now). :D

i had the 'de ja vu' feeling ytd with weiyi again.. and i really wonder which is reality.. if i had this power to predict the future, which portion that i predicted will come true? hahaha.. this doesnt really matter thats why i m striving hard to see the result i want.. work harder, harder, harder!

i was reflecting again.. and thinking if really, i watch too much of the 'wo yao dai ti yue liang cheng fa ni' de anime.. XD


felt that my life and character was in some ways very alike to the female pig trotters.. even though i think i've blogged abt this before.. and even in the way that i 'realised my mission'..

------------------------------- .. -----------------------------------------------
i need to fight harder.. to really reach out to my YWDs.. although currently i've quite a number but muz not be lax and complacent.. alrdy 1+ year and seriously i hasnt achieve anything much..

i just need to fight on continuously.. and not think so much.. i shall not look back but advance, advance and follow sensei's footsteps as much as i can..


------------------------------- .. -----------------------------------------------

weather is super hot these few days.. maybe i can lose some fats from sweating.. XD but quite impossible.. shldnt complain so much because i still work in an air-coned office..

i shall live my june holidays to the fullest! :D


Gambarimasu! to myself and my comrades. lets protect our mentor and his dream!

ouch... my stomach hurts again.. i wonder if i ate something wrong.. and the longer i remain still, the more unbearable it becomes.. i think i jus need to move ard.. today at ofc alrdy make my face green green.. my student asked me "teacher are you ok? you angry ar.."


after much thinkin.. i think ther's something wrong w my communication system. perhaps i talk/behave like a ET so much so that even i dun understand what is the response tt i want from others.. ha!


i need the courage.. have i said this before? yet im afraid of the result with the courage. :S hahahaha.. anw, june holis is coming and i'll be busy! :( boohoohoo.. no more slacking.. but its good la.. work harder man, ah tu!

*yawns*


its wednesday!!


1/3 of the month.. 10% of my pay left to survive for another 2/3 month.. so how much mus i spend everyday so that i can get $9 left in my bank?

solve the above question and show your workings.



LOL!!



my weekend was super tiring.. and something's quite wrong with me recently.. hair's super messy, dark eye circles, breakouts everywhere, occasional headaches.. sound like a monster! RAWR~~


need to start afresh.. i will do my best! to be more determined..argh.. D-E-T-E-R-M-I-N-E-D.


so far, so good neh.. bunneh.. ahaha.. its not something tt will come to me naturally but something we have to struggle to do in order to breakthru current circumstances and win. has been with the youths for the past two prac without my ymd counterparts and i feel like way back when i was the i-c for the band. hmmm.. anw, somehow i felt that i wasnt 'certified' enough to lead them.. but i'll cont to chant for everyone's growth n that i will be able to contribute!


and here's another math question:
bunneh has to travel to two places on a weekend. first stop would be to the east by 5pm and to the north-west by 6pm. if bunneh stays in the north and it'd take 1 hour to get to the first stop and second stop each; 1.5 hour from first stop to second stop, how will bunneh be able to reach both place on time?


i think i've gone mad.. *pop pills*



was at syc ytd for youth dance prac and saw the kind uncle(i think his surname is teo. :P) who was lookin after syc! he's a very nice man who took efforts to remember names of youths and never fails to take good care of us. hmmm, maybe he knows that i need encouragement and he gave me the photos that he 'found' taken for 3.16.. *touched* thank you uncle!! i'll work hard.. =)

jus gotten my pay.. and my HP bill well in advance. got a HUGE shock at the amount of my bill.. and i hasnt pay it yet.. wonder how am i gg to be debt-free this time round.? sighs..

ARH.. (pulls hair)


still, nothing works to help lessen the impact of my situation..


went to compasspoint on wednesday (or isit tuesday?) by myself and woah... they had some renovation n new shops in the mall! didnt managed to walk the entire place but now they've replaced some shops with TBS,TFS,G and others.. well, it jus seems as if its gonna be a shoppin centre jus like any other shoppin centre. catch the ball?


and so yesterday met with my wss frens for anothers' birthday celeb.. was at suntec and they were k-ing till 7pm. so sad! i didnt managed to sing.. sobs x 10~~ then i waited outside for them till they're done.. suntec has this new area call MPG where its linked from tower 4 to tower 5(i think) at the 3rd level. and this area is like.. marina sq or hmv where its a whole lot of small shops selling all different kind of things.. quite interesting but many shops were not there yet so nth much still.. but i think it'd be another interesting hangout place for young peeps ba.. (im still young!!)


then after, met my frens at soup restaurant for dinner.. wow.. so chinese.. ahahaha.. had our dinner there with lots of photos, talking and eating.. someone mentioned that its the first time we ate chinese food together.. lolx... really true.. cuz last time when we were still schooling, dun have 'kar-chng, kar-chng' for it.. now that some of us workin and stuff, we can eat at middle-class restaurants alrdy.. but chinese food.. ahaha.. more like for family to get together kinda stuff..


and.. the heel of my pumps came off!! omg omg omg.. it was in the middle of our photo taking as the bill was being settled and i felt something weird at my heel and when i saw, the heel already came off.. urgh.. i had no choice but to pluck out the heel of the other one as well.. and that leave me stepping on 2 screws.. sighs.. i wonder y does my shoe gets wear out so often.. Lucky.. its at suntec wher ther're lots of shops.. so i bought 2 pair of shoe ther.. 2nd pair 20% off! *claps*


anyway.. ther's 2(3) more days left to sept and i already spend my pay 7788.. haven pay my shockin HP bill and thers like 2-3 more birthdays to go.. ARGH~~ help!!! SOS please, someone helpppppp me.


lets jus scrimp n save on every lil thing, and i'll be as 'niao' as i can.. hehehe.. and may 26th sept faster faster come.. hayaku!

the weekend was over! and it means a new, refreshing, tiring, hectic, exciting week ahead.. many things to look forward, provided i am keeping things going.


friday.. wad i do? oops.. memory failure..


oh! i went shoppin with my mom! not really shoppin, but juz out to get some clothes for work.. hehe.. 5/7 days a week so muz wear nice nice then will feel good.. cuz weekends, i'm usually gg to kaikans or.. mtgs or.. runnin ard and i do not have the chance to wear pretty x2!! i'm sure most (workin)ladies would agree to this point.


sat, slept a lil later then i went to meet my zone.. wow, kun nan chong chong wor.. sighs.. change and change and change.. but its ok la.. train my patience.. maybe these things are really to train myself and do my HR neh.. :P

we chanted for awhile and she wanted to find out more about my chpt.. sighs.. i'm really feeling pretty stressed and helpless.. you yi zhong wu zu de gan jue.. :S and how can i make myself remember more things? i really want to do more, do more, do more.. how can i do that? human zhen de shi bian huan duo che..

then rushed down for prac.. luckily i wasnt very late. didnt prac much for myself but at least now we can hear abit more of what the entire piece sounds like.. more complete kind.. yay~ and i'm spoiling the sound of it.. i'm so sorry peeps! i will really try even harder to polish my scales and sounds and everything.. :S

then we almost spoilt meow's dad car by squeezing 4 person into the backseat.. ok la.. my bad.. i'm taking up more space in it ok? lolx~ but save time and $$ leh~~ meow's super loads of good fortune to have such parents. ^^ and i managed to get home, have a quick dinner, pack up a lil and go for my zadankai which is near my place.. ahahha.. so my district is near my place wher my place is near my district. get it?


sunday. home-delivered hamster cage to tutu kueh. damn nice rite me? i also think so.. ahahhaa.. next time i also wan home delivery service.. though we missed a few paras of the gongyo, i managed to chant.. 45 mins! yay~ clap clap.. this is important because:
1. the auntie beside me was chanting off-beat.. which makes it a lil diff for me to concentrate if i dont concentrate.
2. with so many things to accomplish, its even more challenging to find time to chant loads.
3. i have been lagging alot behind my SHINE campaign. even tutu kueh completed her chart leh.. zhen shi paiseh.. :P

then off i went to tsc.. am very lucky to get transport to and fro TSC-HQ.. cuz it was drizzling + raining + some random thunder and lightning which makes it a very wet sunday indeed. and i have good frens who wait for me!! hehehe.. thank you very much neh~ but due to my shi yi zhen, i still forgot to pass one of them something.. argh.. i need to eat pig's brain le..

then fri rend.. was a lil better than my previous times and this is going to be my first performance for fri rend/gakkai in this year.. as u have greater responsibilities, the chances to do what u like(like performing as performers) decreases greatly.. like FortePiano kind.. jus like after i join the orch.. :P

after end of sept i shall look back at my 07's entry.. ahaha.. and see whether is ther any improvement.. :P lookin forward to many things except month of october onwards.. sigh..

sigh..

sigh..

--- DAILY GOSHO ---
"As practise progresses and understanding grows, the three obstacles and four devils emerge in confusing form, vying with one another to interfere ... One should be neither influenced nor frightened by them."

* three obstacles and four devils - At a time when an ordinary person attains Buddhahood, or at a time when a person is at a turning point in doing their human revolution, the negative aspect of life will always appear in some form. This is an unavoidable fact of life! Nichiren Daishonin assures us of this and asks us to transmit it as an axiom or principle of faith so that it is understood by all those who practise.

This negative aspect is often referred to as the 'three obstacles and four devils' (in Japanese, sansho shima). Obstacles refer to things which appear to be outside of ourselves (but which ultimately have their origins in our lives) and the devils, or negative elements, are 'internal'. What makes these obstacles and devils serious is that if we are influenced by them we may stop practising Buddhism. They confront us at a specific point in time - usually when we are about to grow in our lives and move forwards. The fact that at a difficult moment we may think that we should stop practising is a sign that it is an attack of one of the three obstacles and four devils. From a positive point of view these hindrances enable us to see a weakness in our lives so that we can chant and become stronger in that area.

(Ref.: http://www.sgi-uk.org/index.php/buddhism/humanrevolution)
(Letter to the Brothers - The Writings of Nichiren Daishonin, Vol. 1, page 501) Selection source: "Kyo no Hosshin", Seikyo Shimbun, April 7th, 2008

la la la la~!!

i la la because.. i went KTV-ing!! meow meow dun envy orh.. u nv jio me de.. went w my sis n frens.. we were supposed to catch a movie cuz she got some discount coupon la.. which is gg to be expired on yesterday itself.. so smart rite?

but there wasnt any nice movie leh.. either that one of them already watched(i hasnt watched movie for a loooooooong time!! ): ), or.. the timings wasnt good, or the show wasnt good.. so.. *scratch head*

met my sis at SLS(its not Super Slow Service or Super Lame Shop or wadever-you-can-think-of but Sim Lim Square!!!) to get wireless adaptor.. since she gey kiang go get some unknown brand de.. hiak hiak hiak.. burn hole in pocket lor..

after that we were picked up at bugis n met another fren at suntec.. in the end decided to go for ktv.. the fact that it is a monday!! hahaha.. so fun!! (li sheng jie de ge..) and they wanted to go the marina one cuz its newer and bigger??

yay!! i like ktv-ing.. grabbed the mike for as long as i could.. sang until breathless liao.. and i think they are all havin nightmare of my singing.. wahahhahahahahaha.. but too bad, who ask them to not know how to sing? :P bu shi wo de cuo wor..

reached home ard 12+ le.. [deaded].. haha!! i shall survive on air for the rest of the months.. =[

rawr~~~~ i'm super sleepy... today's Children Day!!

HAPPY CHILDREN'S DAY!!

bloggers' text colors is really limited.. hahaha..



had a quick weekend.. why quick? cuz.. veri fast lo.. lols.. as if mon was juz ytd, then it was friday and soon, the weekends were over and i'm lying in bed waiting for the arrival for a whole new week.. hahaha.



weathers' becomin hotter these few days.. slept at 1 and woke at 620 today.. i think its earliest i've woken up since a veri long time..hahahaha..



sad and regretful to say, even for sunday morning gongyo also i didnt managed to wake up early.. this week for e.g, i woke up at 5 ++ , think it was too early then went back to slp.. and i asked my mom to go along but she didnt wan.. so i tot i'd slp a lil while longer.. who knows! by the time i awoke again, the same scenario, the sky was bright; i looked at the clock, it was 7 + alrdy! i quickly prepare and by the time i reach, it was 9 and GD was alrdy givin guidance.. :P

saw my cute lil ah-jing again! haha.. wonder when will he be nicer and closer to other pple other than his mom..

make some arrangements then i bought + brought my macs breakfast to jinsi hse.. aft a super short gongyo, we travelled down to sengkang to mwwt weiyi.. bla bla bla,

aft tt we all went for our zadankai.. jinsi went back to tamp, weiyi to sengkang and me supposedly to hougang.. but i forgot to top-up my card so i U-turn back.. juz then weiyi called me.. she said she lost her jacket!! ah!! so we went back to look for the jacket. i think she's veri heart-broken tt her jacket is gone.. bought a new one at Gio instead.. :S yup.. so then we went to take the train la..

i didnt attend my own zadankai cuz mine was last week.. saw the two cute lil gurls.. haha.. i wud very much like to foster them.. =)

went home, haha.. immediately turned into a pig.. i slept and then my nephews were home!

celeb the lil one's b'dae.. they still too young i think, the elder one keep wanting to snatch the limelight from the younger one when it was the latters' b'dae.. then very "funnily", the younger one asked his bro to blow out the candle.. u see them like push each other :"you blow! no, you blow!" an interesting sight.. hahaha...

so they ate the cake lor..

then play puzzle also wan to fight.. and i became the victim.. since i was playin w them.. they keep askin me"ah yi, this one put wher, ah yi this one is which one" so i help them lor.. then kenna shoot.. my dad ask me not to interrupt their play.. --"

babies/kids/brats/children are indeed weird.. they do not need to learn how to laugh, how to cry, how to be jealous, how to be angry.. is this human nature? haha..

back from sensei's video..

it was very wonderful..

sensei says tt "a true disciple puts his words into action..

then there was this ywd from SGI-USA tt sensei asked :"do you remember how old were you when i first met you?"
the lady replied:"yes. 6."
sensei continued:"wow.. you can still remember.."
the lady said:"yes. at the point in time, i already decided that you are my mentor in life!"

wow! she was so resolute and my tears jiu rolled down le.. *claps!

kept thinkin on my way home.. wad can i do? like someone's blog, tt person has also changed since the first post till now, from not-so-good to maybe better.. but me? i've changed from good to worse.. hai.. really muz jia you le.. like i-ban says.. ".. take ur time, but sensei cannot wait" ya lor.. i dunno wad cani do, wad shld i do and wad muz i do..

umzzy says i'm emotional.. maybe cuz of tt i seemed more childish? and more 'bu dong shi' (meaning insensible)

Cheng Zhang! Cheng Zhang! Wo yi Cheng Zhang!! =)