words unspoken...

hmmm.. i imply dunno what to name this blog cuz its been a looong time since i blog and i've many things to *vomit* out at once.. juz had our SD anniv ytd.. and today is the exact day of SSA SD 23rd anniv..
Happy
23rd
birthday SD!!!

happy happy.. have been busy preparing for SD anniv that i have no time for anything else.. no time to go shop for new year, no time to do homevisits, no time to call my mbrs.. is this an excuse? maybe ba.. so now i muz work doubly hard to replace the time i've lost.. i'm feelin so down.. sigh.. the video wasn't good.. i'm so da*n sad.. even though with all the encouragement.. but one thing which YJ say was :"the fact that 8 chiefs came forward, tryin to rem the past and encourage us was the best thing. it is US who benefitted."(similar text) well, everyone said "dun worry, it was not bad.. etc" but no one gave me a concrete resaaurance.. yea.. i truly agree.. i'm still sorry to all the chiefs, those tt i couldn't manage to put up their video despite them crackin their brains and makin time for us, as well as those chiefs who i spoilt the significance of their words with the video.. but i'm gonna make the compiled archive of SD history a truly great one and really keep it well this time so people can know what has SD done since then and into the future..

attachment: still struggling.. argh!! weili yao jia you ah!! veri sad and disappointed with myself.. is this what i want? even so, how can i show actual proof? i'm like the worm in the lion's body.. :S

district: hasn't been gg for homevisiting for veri.......... long time.. i'm now officially appointed YWD district.. (as of nov 2005) but no growth and lil participation durin mtgs.. sigh.. isit cuz of YWD? tt day aft mtg we had our yongsha, and it seems like the ldr were indirectly shooting me.. i cried all the way home.. i'm trying my best.. with so many other committment.. i'm trying veri hard to balance.. i need to foster more youths.. where are all the bodhisattvas of the earth? i shldn't complain.. do more shakubuku, show more actual proofs!! follow sensei, there can be no mistake bout it.. yi ding yao sheng li!! i'm the youngest in age among all the leaders.. can i lead them?

SNCO : we're havin our concert this sun.. jia you! till now ther's not even full instrumentation.. prayers.. is all that i need.. i know i may not be ther best player, but being a band major before, i know all that discipline stuffs durin sec sch is not of any use.. we muz unite in itaidoshin and really inspire ever single mbr so they can feel for themself.. many pple say our band is not helpin kosen-rufu etc.. but i will not give up! i've chosen to come here to fulfill my mission.. so i muz do my best and try every single means even until i've exhausted myself.. is there anyone tt will join me in this battle?

SYC-exhit comm.. wad happen to our exhibition?? hehe.. no news of it.. all of us are too busy with our individual mission + new yr preps.. i haven clean my room/hse.. :( no mood for new yr..

was talkin to my dear Annie juz now on msn.. she was sharin with my her blog and her desire to learn chinese.. i'm so encouraged by her.. even though she only can understand simple chi conversations, but she made the effort to ask her colleague how to translate chi into eng.. wow..
i also cannot lose to her.. i muz learn dialect and prove the rest wrong!!

sorry for my super long blog.. thru this SD anniv,thou i feel its not really a victorious one, but i received alot of encouragement.. what is the purpose of SD? i rem one of the chiefs shared in the video. "if SD is not contributing to the society, then the group need not exist." this is something tt etched deep in my heart.. yes! SD exist for a reason. we have a special mission in SD and i'm left with only a few more months.. i dun wan to leave juz like this.. T_T haha.. i muz create the future!!! (^-^)

oh ya!! before i forget.. my colleague shared w me a veri interesting/impt msg today.. he said.. our life is veri short.. 1 yr is over before we know it.. so we muz really treasure and plan our future.. it is like in the song from Five for Fighting : 100 years -

100 Years I'm 15 for a moment
Caught in between 10 and 20
And I'm just dreaming
Counting the ways to where you are

I'm 22 for a moment
She feels better than ever
And we're on fire
Making our way back from Mars

15 there's still time for you
Time to buy and time to lose
15, there's never a wish better than this
When you only got 100 years to live

I'm 33 for a moment
Still the man, but you see I'm a they
A kid on the way
A family on my mind

I'm 45 for a moment
The sea is high
And I'm heading into a crisis
Chasing the years of my life

15 there's still time for you
Time to buy, Time to lose yourself
Within a morning star 15
I'm all right with you

15, there's never a wish better than this
When you only got 100 years to live
Half time goes by
Suddenly you're wise
Another blink of an eye 67 is gone
The sun is getting high
We're moving on...

I'm 99 for a moment
Dying for just another moment
And I'm just dreaming
Counting the ways to where you are

15 there's still time for you
22 I feel her too
33 you're on your way
Every day's a new day...
15 there's still time for you
Time to buy and time to choose
Hey 15, there's never a wish better than this
When you only got 100 years to live -

weili

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